If you have done anything that really shows your love and passion for something, chances are you have had a critic or two. Especially if you put it out on the web.
In fact, I have had many. People that have said what I am doing is arrogant and wrong. I have had people pick my physical appearance a part, assume my motives and judge my character.
I remember the day I had my first taste of criticism and let me just tell you I crumbled. I wanted to quit, I thought maybe they are right. I fell completely into this pot of insecurity and self-doubt. However, after a moment of self-pity, I used that circumstance to toughen my skin. I realized the bigger this company may grow the more critics and skeptics I will meet. I had to come to a place where I was confident in what I was doing. Yes, I may not have it all figured out – but if my intentions are pure, everything else is learning.
I think that is incredibly important for us to realize. I meet so many creatives that are scared to be perceived as someone they aren't. They are scared that someone will think they are full of themselves if they share their work on social media platforms, however chances are if you already have that conscious in the forefront, anything you put out there is not going to have that ora of arrogance.
We should not allow someones opinion to defeat us but make us stronger. Here are my notes below from watching this amazing video by Brene Brown on critics.
It is not about winning, it is not about losing. its about showing up and being seen. Having courage.
If you are going to show up and be seen there is only one guarantee and that is you will get your ass kicked. Especially if you have committed to creating in your life.
If courage is a value that we hold - this is a consequence. you cant avoid it.
If you aren't in the arena also getting your ass kicked, i am not interested in your feedback.
When you armor up against vulnerability you shut yourself off but...
with out vulnerability you can not create.
I use to think the best way to put your work out into the world is to make sure the critics are not in the arena but you have no control over who is in the arena.
The best way is to know they are there and to know exactly what they are going to say to you.
There are 3 seats you look at when you are vulnerable with your ideas:
- scarcity - what am i doing
- self comparison
Who is in the 4th seat? reserve a seat , I see you , I hear you, but I'm going to do this anyway
Note: If courage is my value, i have to show up. whether its successful or not thats irrelevant.
If you aren't failing than you aren't showing up.
Self-Criticism // There is an ideal of what you are supposed to be but a lot of us orphan the parts of us that don't fit in that ideal.